I stumbled into Girlpool's video performing on Youtube and I have always came back since, every once in a while.
Their stark voices and the clean music were memorable. The lyrics are sort of dystopian, like the future society or feelings deep inside another person which I have not encountered before. So honest. Also can I say, their seriousness while performing was amazing. It gives the message that it is okay, it is good, it is cool, to put effort into the things you like and believe in, even if it is not the mainstream idea or style. There was the saying right, that if someone believes in something so much, it must be true to a certain extent, or you tend to trust what they say about it. Their seriousness in contrast to their outfit was also great.
Now onto the clothes, accessories and make-up. I also want to cut my fringe too short and perform. I also want to wear super different earrings on each ear and go out confidently. I also want to wear a bright red top paired with checkered pants and not care what people think. I want to wear that ring I got from a Christmas cracker on my pinky and be unashamed. The reddest lipstick. The sharpest voice in a karaoke room. Crazy rock perm with six bobby pins. Cheap shiny bead bracelets that kids wear. Their expressiveness wows me, their comfortableness liberates a part of me.
You might say, just wear it and go out in the public. Yes, it is what happens in the ideal world *cough pun*. But for all my wishing, I also want to be not too weird and unaccepted by the people around me. The best position is to be closest to the fine line between quirky-but-still-normal and weird, but falling on this side of the line. And I figured the only way to end up there is to not care if people thinks you are weird. I am trying to think that, to not care what people think, but to care whether I express myself.
As always, my thoughts are too much emotions and too little logic so apologies if you did not follow. I doubt I would a few years down the road. But it just feels so real.
